FreeRiddim | The South African uber Poetry, Arts & Culture Magazine

Column: The Man Who Knows Nothing | Written by Lukhanyiso Tena, South Africa

Peer Pressure
LUKHANYISO TENA, SOUTH AFRICA.

>>There is a well known African idiom that says “Umntu ngumntu, ngabantu”,
that when translated means: “you are because I am”. This well-known idiom got me thinking about how we copy and paste our way into originality as humans. From the moment we are born, we duplicate traits from other people’s personalities to forge our own, so we can call ourselves individuals. This ironic human condition is all great in the infantry stage of a human life for one has to know how to be a human.

>>This is why you will find that most parents believe in setting a good example for their children. It is their feeble attempt at trying to shape their youngster’s mind. Not knowing that while you can teach a child how to walk and talk you can never teach them how to think. This attempt calls for an immediate alteration as far as some youthful hobbies and habits are concerned for you want your child to behave humanly around other humans. So with all that said it is fair for the parent to expect their young one to follow their patterns of life-ways and thinking. Anthropologists call this process of continuation of behavioral patterns and thought enculturation. Enculturation is a partially conscious and unconscious learning experience whereby the older generation invites, induces and compels the younger generation to adopt traditional ways of thinking and behaving.

"we duplicate traits from other people’s personalities to forge our own"

>>However, is it possible for this process to work properly in a world were human interaction is so vast and variable, because our life patterns and ways of thinking are not the result of influence from our parents alone. Most people I know have copied and pasted most of what we know from the streets. From the way we think, verbal express ourselves to even how we appear. Most of us heard that birds and the bees’ story out in those same streets. Graeme Codrington and Sue Grant-Marshall’s book on generation gaps, Mind the gap, says our outlook on life and behavioral patterns are largely reflective of the era into which we are born.

>>All of this adoption and duplication of human traits is done in the name of conforming. We create an individuality that will conform to the patterns and ideals of a society. Adopting what controversial cartoonist Zapiro called a “sheep mentality”. But that is the easier way of doing things. It is easier to act in accordance to the group than to act in accordance to the individual for with the group you share the responsibility if the actions are faulty whereas as an individual you suffer alone. It is easier to join the crowds in singing “hosanna” but harder to explain your decision not to join in the choral. We all know what I’m talking about and have probably experienced it first hand. Think about the time you wanted something because “all the other kids have it” or wanted to do something because “all the other kids are doing it”.

>>It is easy to follow patterns and walk in the trails of those who have walked before because at least you have a direction. But accepting “herd mentally” means you have a direction set out for you already, all you have to do is conform. The group decides who your friends are and who your enemies are. Think of how an alliance with China means you can’t have brunch with the Daila Lama.

>> But the people that make a difference in the world are always those who usually swim against the current, walking unknown territory and discovering individuality. Being yourself is rapidly becoming a usual thing in our world. Many people are questioning old belief systems today and are fixated about finding the “truth”. Maybe it is an indication of how free we really are today.

>>Or maybe we have pasted so much that we can’t find who we really are.
But what do I know I’m just a man who knows nothing.

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© Lukhanyiso Tena for FreeRiddim